When I finally admitted my feelings for her, I had justifiably expected rejection. It was like an insect trying to win the heard of a Goddess. I was shocked when she told me she felt the same.
Impossible, I thought. I knew she must be lying to me. But, I entertained the thought, and asked her out for a cup of coffee.
My heart nearly stopped as I heard her musical voice form the one word that rang as an angel's bell in my ear: Yes.
That Friday, I drove my way to our nearest cafe, and waited. And waited.
And waited.
After an hour, I sat at a booth and sipped on a cup of coffee, which I had meant to share. As the night went on, my wallet grew lighter and lighter, while my hands shook more and more, both from caffeine, and stress.
The waitress there looked worried as she continued serving me cup after cup of the sweet brown liquid. I would've thought her shift would end, but she stayed until dawn, the same time I left.
I called the woman who had stood me up, asking her why she hadn't come. Apologizing to me, she explained that she had forgotten the exact date, and thought it would be the next Friday. Her voice sounded different than usual, and I somehow knew she was lying. Despite this, I gave her the benefit of the doubt, I told myself there was a good reason, and full of feable hope, I asked if we could try the date again, the same night.
She said yes, that she would definitely be there. I put the phone down, and despite the ache in my chest, I made myself look decent, and drove to the same cafe as the night before.
The night wore on as once again I binged myself on coffee, served by the same waitress as the night before. She seemed just as worried as she had the previous night, though it was hard to tell behind the wall of tears in my eyes. I didn't want to be there, I just wanted to go home. Still, I repeated my actions from the night before, and drank until the sun once more rose above the horizon.
As I went out the glass doors, I saw the waitress turn and walk towards me from the employee entrance, and I waited to hear what she was going to say.
"Hey, sorry. I just... Well, I don't know who it is you're beating yourself up over, but she doesn't deserve a guy like you. Here." She jammed her hand toward me, a piece of paper clenched between her fingers. A phone number.
I hesitated, my palm half-open. I didn't want to be impolite, but I also didn't want to go on a date with someone I had just met. Before I could decide what to do, however, she put it in my hand, and ran off.
Upon getting back home, I threw myself on the bed. Though my energy was all but depleted, I couldn't bring myself to sleep. I laid there, and watched the daylight grow brighter through the window as the day went on.
It was midday by the time I woke from a slumber I hadn't remember falling into. For a few minutes longer, I continued to lie there, until I could bring it on myself to call the girl who had stood me up. I had to get a reason, some kind of explanation, anything for my fragile heart to cling to. I dialed the number I knew only too-well, and waited. No response. I tried again, listening to the ringing from the other end...
No response.
I knew from experience that she would still be home around this time. I dropped the phone, and turned away. I could've handled it if she had just said no. Or, hell, even just stood me up... But to not even give me an answer... Why this?
I knew I wasn't enough for her. I knew it.
That day, I didn't leave my room. I laid in bed, alternating my behavior between crying my eyes out, and getting back two nights of lost sleep. I didn't want to do anything anymore. There wasn't a reason to care.
I didn't get up until 8pm the next night, and as I rose, I heard something soft crinkle under me. I got up and inspected the bed, to find a small scrap of paper; the waitress's phone number.
I called her, desperate to have anyone make me feel better. When she picked up, she sounded excited, and I smiled involuntarily. We scheduled a date for the next Friday, and she admitted to taking over her coworkers' shifts just to see me. We agreed to skip a cafe and head to the park for a walk.
We had a wonderful day that bled into a night on the town. We couldn't seem to stop seeing each other. Months went by, and we talked about our future together, having kids, and...
Today, I'm getting married.
Impossible, I thought. I knew she must be lying to me. But, I entertained the thought, and asked her out for a cup of coffee.
My heart nearly stopped as I heard her musical voice form the one word that rang as an angel's bell in my ear: Yes.
That Friday, I drove my way to our nearest cafe, and waited. And waited.
And waited.
After an hour, I sat at a booth and sipped on a cup of coffee, which I had meant to share. As the night went on, my wallet grew lighter and lighter, while my hands shook more and more, both from caffeine, and stress.
The waitress there looked worried as she continued serving me cup after cup of the sweet brown liquid. I would've thought her shift would end, but she stayed until dawn, the same time I left.
I called the woman who had stood me up, asking her why she hadn't come. Apologizing to me, she explained that she had forgotten the exact date, and thought it would be the next Friday. Her voice sounded different than usual, and I somehow knew she was lying. Despite this, I gave her the benefit of the doubt, I told myself there was a good reason, and full of feable hope, I asked if we could try the date again, the same night.
She said yes, that she would definitely be there. I put the phone down, and despite the ache in my chest, I made myself look decent, and drove to the same cafe as the night before.
The night wore on as once again I binged myself on coffee, served by the same waitress as the night before. She seemed just as worried as she had the previous night, though it was hard to tell behind the wall of tears in my eyes. I didn't want to be there, I just wanted to go home. Still, I repeated my actions from the night before, and drank until the sun once more rose above the horizon.
As I went out the glass doors, I saw the waitress turn and walk towards me from the employee entrance, and I waited to hear what she was going to say.
"Hey, sorry. I just... Well, I don't know who it is you're beating yourself up over, but she doesn't deserve a guy like you. Here." She jammed her hand toward me, a piece of paper clenched between her fingers. A phone number.
I hesitated, my palm half-open. I didn't want to be impolite, but I also didn't want to go on a date with someone I had just met. Before I could decide what to do, however, she put it in my hand, and ran off.
Upon getting back home, I threw myself on the bed. Though my energy was all but depleted, I couldn't bring myself to sleep. I laid there, and watched the daylight grow brighter through the window as the day went on.
It was midday by the time I woke from a slumber I hadn't remember falling into. For a few minutes longer, I continued to lie there, until I could bring it on myself to call the girl who had stood me up. I had to get a reason, some kind of explanation, anything for my fragile heart to cling to. I dialed the number I knew only too-well, and waited. No response. I tried again, listening to the ringing from the other end...
No response.
I knew from experience that she would still be home around this time. I dropped the phone, and turned away. I could've handled it if she had just said no. Or, hell, even just stood me up... But to not even give me an answer... Why this?
I knew I wasn't enough for her. I knew it.
That day, I didn't leave my room. I laid in bed, alternating my behavior between crying my eyes out, and getting back two nights of lost sleep. I didn't want to do anything anymore. There wasn't a reason to care.
I didn't get up until 8pm the next night, and as I rose, I heard something soft crinkle under me. I got up and inspected the bed, to find a small scrap of paper; the waitress's phone number.
I called her, desperate to have anyone make me feel better. When she picked up, she sounded excited, and I smiled involuntarily. We scheduled a date for the next Friday, and she admitted to taking over her coworkers' shifts just to see me. We agreed to skip a cafe and head to the park for a walk.
We had a wonderful day that bled into a night on the town. We couldn't seem to stop seeing each other. Months went by, and we talked about our future together, having kids, and...
Today, I'm getting married.
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